Can fallen Dolphins overtake falling Ravens?

By Anthony Bialy  |   Friday, December 14, 2007  |  Comments( 5 )

Miami Dolphins
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One of the remarkable aspects of the Dolphins' unbearably sad season is how they've illustrated they can lose to teams of any record, from the juggernaut Patriots and dominant Cowboys to mediocre or slightly worse squads such as Philadelphia and Houston down to marginally less repulsively dreadful franchises like the Jets. Sunday's opponent, the Ravens, are grazing the bottom category at a woeful 4-9, but even more ghastly is their current fragile mental condition, a malady that Miami could possibly exploit. They're bad and getting worse, and the Dolphins might finally be able to prey on another plagued team.

What's notable is that Baltimore is terrible in a different way than Miami. The Ravens have importantly lost seven straight after starting the campaign 4-2, meaning they went from potential divisional winners to miserable doormats. At the same time, the crashing Ravens have mirrored the Dolphins in that they're adept at losing by widely varying margins.

Similar to Miami famously not only getting occasionally trounced but also losing six of its games this season by three points, Baltimore has been a field goal short twice along with one loss by five and another by seven. The Ravens are also adept at losing by medium margins, with two 14-point losses to accompany their borderline 18-point loss to San Diego and outright blowouts by 24 to Indianapolis and 31 to Pittsburgh. They've figured out how to drop games in numerous fashions, which I guess is tricky to do in its own warped way.

Of course, one of Baltimore's narrow losses was to the universe's greatest team in New England, but the fact that it only fell by three to a franchise now on track to win out is obscured by the wicked manner in which the Ravens came unglued. The vocal and physical reaction to calls going the other way made them look like perps in a special NFL episode of "Cops," flipping out in front of the authorities while everyone watching shook their heads sadly while giggling.

As for the last time each team won, this game is the equivalent of the Indians facing the Cubs in the World Series, except, instead of being for a championship, it's for nothing more than a single elusive regular-season victory. Ravens fans may feel deprived when they consider that their team's last win was on Oct. 14, but that rotten feeling may be somewhat alleviated by pointing out that Miami last won on Dec. 10, 2006. Yes, the Dolphins have now gone over one full year without a victory, as that miserably tense, uptight feeling after a loss must almost seem natural by now.

But, records aside, the fact is that the Ravens are currently deflated, which in a way is more painful than being on the roster of the never-inflated Dolphins. Which is worse, falling from a tree or already lying in the forest muck for ages? It's a brutal yet fascinating pairing of opponents. After all, Baltimore is just becoming accustomed to futility and crankiness, while Miami could teach a class on frustration.

A battle to end two markedly different kinds of misery will determine whether one team will continue its fantastic midseason collapse or if the other will get that much closer toward having to wait until next season for a win. It'll be like seeing two Josh Groban fans, either females or culturally dainty males, get in a fistfight over the last copy of one of his CDs at Best Buy: Neither of the participants could be considered good at combat, but you want to watch just to discover who prevails because they want the prize more. Subtract the hair-pulling and scratching, and the Dolphins-Ravens game takes on the same feel.
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