RF365’s odds on the odd

By Os Davis | Friday, May 23, 2008 | ( 0 )

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Another week of football news, another several options by which you can fritter away your money. While the worms are coming out of the woodwork to munch on the already moth-eaten reputation of the Patriots and owners showed their true colors (or rather, color) once again with the acceptance of a labor lockout in 2011, the money lines never sleep.

RealFootball365.com analyzed the word on the street and in Vegas – well, on the street. OK, my street. OK, I talked to a couple of friends. All right, all right, I surfed around for 17 minutes and most of that was spent on YouTube... – to bring our weekly odds on the odd from around the NFL. Enjoy!

As always, these lines are for amusement purposes only. RealFootball365.com does not condone gambling of any sort, except for harmless legal forms such as lottery tickets, office pools, stock market speculation, casino blackjack, etcetera.

To happen in 2011
Owners will lock out players: 1/1
Players union will announce general strike before lockout: 4/1
Players union will announce symbolic general strike after lockout: 2/1
Major pharmaceutical manufacturers will report record-breaking stock values: 1/1
Brett Favre will announce retirement: 10/1
Matt Millen will be fired from Detroit Lions: .242/1

“Cover boy” for EA Sports’ Madden 2012
Gene Upshaw: 1/5
Brett Favre: 2/1
The Field: OFF

Disciplinary action, if any, to be handed Tom Lewand in light of recent threats made to journalist Phil Caputo of the Oakland Press
Suspension from his duties as Detroit Lions executive VP/COO: 10/1
Suspension from his duties as Detroit Lions executive VP/COO, whatever those may be: 8/1
Nothing, so there: 4/1
No comment: 3/2
Promotion within the organization: 1/9

Actions to be taken in light of Ross Tucker’s allegations that the New England Patriots violated the NFL’s rules on the injured reserve
Token “investigation”: Questionable
Any sort of penalty levied against the Patriots and/or team employees: Doubtful
Nothing, so there: Probable
“We’re just looking ahead to next week, we've got a game to play against a very good team...”: OFF

Winner of conference championship
Indianapolis Colts: 3/1
New York Giants: 5/1

Proposition bets: Colts-Giants matchup in Super Bowl XLIII and...
...Colts win: 7/1
...Giants win: 17/2
...the game goes into overtime: 50/1
...in struggling against an extreme personality crisis caused by having to root for both of his sons simultaneously, Archie Manning drinks a bit too much on Super Bowl eve, splits into two and fights himself to the death in a junkyard: 70/1
...Olivia Williams Manning admits she always liked Eli best: 80/1
...any record in passing, individual or combined, are broken: 6/1
...all records for product endorsement, individual or duo, are broken: OFF

The Earth will implode (note: RealFootball365.com accepts no responsibility for impossibility of collecting winnings in the event of apocalypse)
This summer, thanks to an experiment taking place at the Large Hadron Collider which could produce a black hole large enough to subsume the Earth or convert the entire planet into a superdense lump of strange matter: 10,000/1
Thanks to a critical mass of Manningness reached because of a Colts-Giants matchup in Super Bowl XLIII: 1/1

Happy gambling! And not to worry about that crazy black hole thing. I’m sure those ultra-clever folks at the European Center for Nuclear Research know exactly what they’re doing...

(What’s that? What do you mean, “no such thing as intergalactic travel”?)

Laying down the lines throughout the year at RealFootball365.com

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	About Os Davis Os Davis has taken a twisted route to get to RealFootball365.com in his nearly 17 years in professional writing, working in any number of capacities in the sportswriting, news reporting and film criticism worlds. In print media, Os has served as editor at a few publications, including Albuquerque's...
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