Dillon and Maroney to run on water

By Os Davis  |   Thursday, October 26, 2006  |  Comments( 1 )

New England Patriots
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According to the list of RealFootball365's own Eric Krupka, life holds three glaring impossibilities. While this writer has never attempted to drink massive amounts of quantities of cow juice in a short amount of time (though my friend Steve informs me that his university regularly held just such a contest and that the gallon-in-an-hour can be done), the other two items on Krupka's list need examining in light of Monday night's Minnesota Vikings-New England Patriots clash.

Krupka's second impossibility states that walking on water is also impossible. Interestingly enough, Boston sports radio WEEI recently undertook a poll on the subject of head coach Bill Belichick with regard to surface water ambulation. Respondents from Foxborough and lesser surrounding areas (i.e. Boston, Maine, New Hampshire, etc.) returned results which showed that 87 percent of this population believes that Belichick can and does walk on water regularly. A further 10 percent also believe that Belichick can walk on water, but believe that he'd turn it into wine first. The remaining three percent refused to answer on the grounds that proposing the question was itself heresy.

Impossibility number three in The World According To Krupka: Running against the Vikings. Failing in the face of this run-stuffing 'D' were notables such as DeShaun Foster. In Week 2, Foster put together a measly 26 yards on 13 carries for the Carolina Panthers in a 16-13 overtime loss in Minnesota. And Kevin Jones and the rest of his sorry Detroit Lions were pathetic against the Vikes, with Jones getting eight yards on 10 carries. No typo there. Take the Minny game out of his stats, and Jones has 466 yards on exactly 100 carries. (Incidentally, what's a capable back like Jones doing on a team like this?)

On the New England side of the ball is the Corey Dillon-Laurence Maroney tandem, who will have to perform said walking - or rather running - on water. These two have run up 4.0 and 4.2 yards per carry, respectively, giving the Patriots a running game they haven't possessed since the days of Curtis Martin. After Maroney's ridiculous 125 yards on 15 carries against the Bengals, he's cooled off somewhat (as has the overly loud premature hype to give the youngster Rookie of the Year honors) and was used sparingly in the game against the Buffalo Bills.

Speaking of those Buffalo Bills, take a look at what Willis McGahee did. As the go-to guy on possibly the most one-dimensional offense in the NFL, the Bills live or die by McGahee. On 28 carries, say the numbers, McGahee collected just 78 yards, less than 2.8 per carry. In reality, McGahee's one-yard plunge gave Buffalo a second-quarter lead they never relinquished, and his performance proved to be just enough. The Bills lived, 17-12.

The Vikings, say the cold figures, are allowing 70.8 yards rushing per game; the Patriots are running up just under 113 yards per game. But check this out: This season, Minnesota has given up a less salubrious 89.6666 yards rushing per game on Astroturf, i.e. in the Metrodome. (Home field disadvantage, anyone?) The miracle required from Dillon and Maroney becomes a lot simpler when they are asked to run on plastic grass rather than water.

Giving up those two extra first downs' worth of yardage may be just enough for the running game of the Patriots - masters of the "just enough" strategy - to win the battle against the Purple Cannibals.

I wouldn't bet against the Pats in a milk-drinking contest, either. Though, as Steve describes such a contest, that would be a horrible thing to see. Really.

Insights into the New England Patriots at RealFootball365.com: A miracle, really.
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About Os Davis

Os Davis has taken a twisted route to get to RealFootball365.com in his nearly 17 years in professional writing, working in any number of capacities in the sportswriting, news reporting and film criticism worlds. In print media, Os has served as editor at a few publications, including Albuquerque's...
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