Well, where *do* you go from here?

By Os Davis  |   Friday, December 05, 2008  |  Comments( 15 )

Oakland Raiders
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Cris Collinsworth and Bob Papa couldn’t get enough and got on the bandwagon early. No, not about the play and/or future prospects of either the Oakland Raiders or the San Diego Chargers on the NFL Network's Thursday night broadcast, but rather in on the familiar refrain: Where do the Raiders go from here?

As though NFL fans needed an(other) encapsulation of the 2008 Raiders season, it was all there in the 34-7 loss to the Chargers: Erratic quality in defensive play. Obvious outward cynicism from some players. Terminal underuse of Darren McFadden, followed by the daydreaming rookie getting looks while half-there mentally. Al Davis lurking in the shadows up in the press box (who’s the producer on this show, anyway? Oliver Stone?).

Flashes of brilliance on special teams. Chaos and underwhelming performance out of the QB position. More clips of Raiders fans than Raiders (loved the dude in the gorilla suit). Warren Sapp – Is he officially Public Enemy No. 1 in Raider Nation yet? – going off: “Ain’t no defense bein’ played, no run defense. ... [Derrick] Burgess and that ‘D’ can play; I just ain’t seein’ it tonight.” Lots of easy scoring by the opposition. And Shane Lechler punting, always punting.

Heck, the only things missing from the NFL Network broadcast were a couple of Javon Walker drops and at least one personal foul call against DeAngelo Hall.

It’s well past the point of morbidly watching Raider games – particularly those AFC and AFC West matches that, in a parallel universe, might matter in shaping the playoff picture – just to imagine how your favorite columnist is going to spin the nonsense in his/her next writeup.

(Incidentally, here’s a preview portion of Gregg Easterbrook’s “Tuesday Morning Quarterback” column at ESPN.com: Chicken noise. Down 27-7 very late in the third quarter to the Aqueles que Derivam sua Energia do Relâmpago [Portuguese for “Those Who Derive Their Energy From Lightning”] and having missed to convert on third-and-inches, interim coach Tom Cable sent in the kicking team on fourth-and-short. Boom went the punt and TMQ wrote “Game over” in his notebook. Yes, you are in San Diego territory, but your team is down by three scores and has been mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. What have you got to lose? And now you are 3-10.)

In fact, despite Papa’s claim early in the third quarter that it was “unsettling taking shots at the Raiders,” the only break viewers could possibly get from the Oakland illness was an item that managed to be more embarrassing than the team's “play" -- i.e., a pigeonholed phone call to former Chargers head coach Marty “Come Back, All Is Forgiven" Schottenheimer. You had to love Collinsworth playing Oprah here: “Take us back to that exact moment when, after going 14-2, the front office gave you the huge boot to the gluteus maximus. . .”

In all fairness to Papa, Collinsworth, Sapp and anyone forced to contribute to this telecast, what else is there to say? I mean, you could make a checklist of Raider needs, of What This Team Must Get akin to the following (Collinsworth, sucked dry of inspiration by the two-minute warning, halfheartedly attempted to enumerate; RF365 hereby expounds upon the ex-Bengal’s musings):

• a heck of an offensive line;

• a heck of a quarterbacks coach;

• a head coach who is somehow simultaneously capable of both creating an original game plan yet following owner Davis’ whims to the letter;

• some luck, because whatever karmic debt these Raiders owed – even if you include both the phantom roughing the passer on Stabler in the ’76 divisional playoffs and the whole move-to-L.A.-in-a-snit thing – has surely been paid in the era since Tom Brady’s tuck at least; and

• um, one or two wide receivers might be nice; and

• Change with an Obama rhetoric-like capital ‘C’ in the front office.

Seriously, Raider Nation, can’t you guys revolt? Just get on all your spooky Hell’s Angels, primate, Mad Max, Darth Vader and Satan gear, round up a few torches, pitchforks and baseball bats and head on over to Mr. Burns’ -- I mean, Mr. Davis’ -- mansion to, um, discuss things a bit.

Because that’s starting to look like the only way to go. In the meantime, how many days until the draft?
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About Os Davis

Os Davis has taken a twisted route to get to RealFootball365.com in his nearly 17 years in professional writing, working in any number of capacities in the sportswriting, news reporting and film criticism worlds. In print media, Os has served as editor at a few publications, including Albuquerque's...
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CommentsComments: 15  |  Sign Up  View all comments
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No.1
The Franchise		02:40 AM
12/05/2008
Seriously, Raider Nation, can’t you guys revolt? Just get on all your spooky Hell’s Angels, primate, Mad Max, Darth Vader and...
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No.2
The Franchise		02:42 AM
12/05/2008
thank god for justin miller, and thats about the only good thing i saw from that game....the defense over pursued all the time,...
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No.3
02:58 AM
12/05/2008
What the F*ck is up with JR missing the production meeting? Does he really think he's good enough to miss a meeting....I think...
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